Be happier. Be more fulfilled with a deeper sense of satisfaction with your life
Getting what you want out of life
Do you want more happiness and fulfillment in your life? Most do. So how do we go about getting these? I’m sure you’ve heard the old saying that, “goals are important?” Do you agree with this? I do. However, I’m learning a new way of looking at the world and fulfillment. I hope it helps you as well.
Goals are important however, the “planning process” may be even more important. You see, the human brain is amazing. We have frontal lobes that allow for higher reasoning, imagination and forethought. This means we can “see” into the future. We can envision and plan down the road into our future. We can write the next chapter of our lives and live into it. We can control our own destiny. How cool is that!
My question to you is. Do you have a vision of where your life will be in the future? Specifically in the different areas of your life. Do you have visions of where you want your health to be: Old and sick or old, mature and vibrant? What about your business? What kind of impact will you have in your community? How do you want your family life to be? Your relationships with your partner, you kids? Where do you want to be living and what do you want to be doing?
I’m Canadian but this quote is from an American president. President Eisenhower. He said, “The plan is nothing… but planning is everything!”
Why is that important to you? As you well know, not everything will go as planned. Stuff happens. Thus the plan is nothing. However, the planning process is everything. If you want to improve in some area of your life how do you go about making the change(s)? Can you make things happen? Can you turn your dreams and goals into reality? And… can you do it in a predictable and consistent way. Are you good at this process or do you just go with the flow and “HOPE” it happens?
Here is a quote.
“If you don’t know where you are going… any road will lead there.”
You need a planning process to “design” your life. I want to know where I’m going (my vision) and I’m going to build a road to get there. I used to use the analogy of ladders with my kids. If you want to get to the goal (top of the ladder) you need it to have many steps (rungs). If you only have a few steps, you will have to take big chances, jumping and reaching for the next one. However, if you have many small, easy to reach steps you can easily hit each target and you quickly make progress with out taking chances. It greatly increases your odds of “winning”, of hitting your goal. By the way, if you but the effort in, just make sure the ladder is on the right wall.
Looking down the road have you thought about where you want to be in 5-10 or 25 years? How do you see and envision your life unfolding? Will your plan be perfect in getting there? No of course not. Will you change and make adjustments as you go along? Most likely, thus the planning process is very important.
Planning is about change. How do you control the change process? If you can master change you can consistently get new, better results. Learning how to master planning and change to get predictable, consistent, results is vital to getting and having more fulfillments and satisfaction in your life.
Setting goals means you have a vision of the future. Generally with goals we move away from pain and towards pleasure. You have this vision of how you want things to be and you have a vision of how you don’t want things to be. Use this for motivation and inspiration. What is your vision?
Get a bigger why. The bigger the why, the easier the how! Think about and write down all the reasons you want a goal. Now, think about how you will feel once you obtain it. How will your life be better? How will you feel working towards the end result? How will you feel once you achieve it? Want some more motivation? Use FEAR. Think about what’s at stake if you don’t achieve it? Think about “Why MUST I complete this/ these goals?”
Life is about the balance: Give to get. Your goal is a “want”- you want to get something. That great! However, in return what are you going to give? Are you going to give time, $, input or advice, energy?
When you set your goal you may want to state it as “I want this and in return I’m going to give that. By doing this I’m going to feel like I’m growing, learning, getting better in the process and I’m going to feel amazing and so happy once I complete it. My friends and family will be just as proud of me as I am of myself.”
Small vs large changes. Many small tiny changes maybe insignificant by themselves, with a small emotional investment however, they can add up to a BIG change over a month or year. Some will do one big change ie: quite smoking cold turkey, which has a large emotional investment. Others may decide to just cut down to fewer per day over a month, then go on the patch slowly reducing the does of them, then simply stopping.
Do you like to have choices? Choosing is a choice! Work and build your choosing muscle. Most have such weak and flabby “muscles” in this area so tone them up. Make them big and strong. Use them often even on little things. Choose as often as you can. Remember to, making the decision to let someone else choose, is a choice. This will slowly help you get more of what you want in life.
Don’t limit yourself with simple, limited -this or that thinking and options. Expand your choices. Think, “How can I have this and that?” Control the direction your life takes you (you take it!). Have more input into “YOU”… and your life. This my friend, will greatly boost your happiness, satisfaction and your fulfillment.
Habits make your day. Want new results in your life? Change your habits! The experts all agree that most of our day (80+ %) is run on autopilot… habits. If you want new results get new habits. This is so simple, but many don’t understand and do this.
Think about this. If you changed one habit per week for a year that would be 52 new habits which could amount to BIG CHANGES! What could some of these small and simple habits be? Be early for all meetings and appointments. Listen better (talk less and truly listen and understand more). East more veggies, cut out sugar, use the word “smart” or “brilliant” more often or other positive and uplifting words. How about notice one nice thing about everyone… everyday and tell them. How would that boost your relationships and happiness? Lots.
Commit to the habit (change).
- Get a really big why
- Keep it top of the mind- use reminders
- What are you willing to give to get?
- Add the emotional connection- during and after
- Map out the steps to get there (build your ladder)
You don’t have to do anything… you get to choose to do it. Choose this year to plan your next year and your next 25 years. Boost your fulfillment, happiness and satisfaction.
Design you life and live into it. Have clarity, intention and passion. Move ahead with purpose and a mission. Write the story of your life and live into it.
I’m Robert Ridpath. If you want more help with planning, goal setting and getting more happiness and fulfillment in your life, go to Healthsynergy.ca and check out our training and teaching programs and all the other free material we have to help you have the best year ever.